Miller's Cafe

I feel like I have a confession to make before I write this review. Going into this burger quest, I already had 2 heavy favorites. Shuttle Burger and Miller's Cafe, both places that we didn't go to right away because I wanted to cleanse my palate before going back to my old favorites. Miller's Cafe has a lot of sentimental value for me. They used to have a location in Alief that I used to go to with my grandparents when I was a kid with dreams of tacking a belt-busting double burger.

Now Miller's has three locations that I know of and a fourth that I can't confirm. One is in the Medical Center in Scurlock Tower, one is on Shephard just north of 610, one on Bay Area Blvd way down in League City and there is apparently a fourth in downtown, I'm thinking it may be in the tunnel. The Miller's I usually go to these days is the one on Shephard, and I often end up at the one in the Med Center when I land some work out there, but this review takes place at the one way out in League City.

Nick and I were part of a massive operation on Saturday and Sunday. Clear Creek ISD had a computer virus issue and we both shipped out to go be a part of the solution. Lunchtime came on Saturday and I immediately perked up stating that this was our opportunity to hit up Miller's. We dragged about twenty people into the little burger joint and went to work on getting some cheeseburger goodness.

Miller's is a tried and true burger joint. The menu is hamburger, cheeseburger, mushroom burger, bacon buger, jalepeno burger, chili burger, combinations of the former burgers, doubled up versions of the former burgers and a select few items like chicken sandwiches and a philly cheesesteak. There's a blurry picture on the bottom if you are curious. I ordered up a mushroom swiss burger and Nick brought all guns to bear on a double bacon cheeseburger. I have no idea what Nick drank, but mine was going down the esophageal waterslide with some Diet Pepsi.

Their burgers are massive. You really don't need to bother ordering fries. Even the single patty burger pushes a solid half pound brick of meat with very generous amounts of toppings that are obviously just dropped on by the handful with their standard spread of the popular mustard/mayo combination.

That first bite? It's throws you off a little. It's really good, but the flavor is pretty unique. I have a hard time even coming up with adjectives to describe the flavor that is somehow imparted into the meat outside of generic words like scrumptious. Then you take a second bite and realize that it's for real. It becomes immediately obvious that you just bit into a burger that isn't just a handful of plain or lightly seasoned meat, this stuff is greased up with a fantastic rub, dropped on a hot griddle that sears all of the juices into it and wrapped in the only thing that can contain it... a fresh baked bun that absorbs all the greasy goodness like a sponge and then 2 pieces of butcher paper to ensure that all of it is contained..

They serve up some above average french fries, nothing you'll write home about, but nothing that will dissapoint you. I haven't ever tried the onion rings, and it was Nick's first venture into a Millers and he also downed the fries.

So the ranking? Hell yes it's the best burger so far. We do agree that it only barely edges out the Backyard Grill, which was back on top for a few mere days now that Goodson's has let us down twice in a row after our one amazing experience, leading us to decide that justice must prevail and to dethrone our champion.

Goodson's: Updated

Quick and dirty -- Goodson's is officially dethroned. We have been back two times since we had what we declared was the best burger we've had so far in the city and have found nothing but disappointment. The burger is still good, but it certainly isn't the best, and therefore, we hereby declare that Goodson's is still a decent burger, but no longer in the Top 3. Go get their chicken fried steak instead. It's still a showstopper.

Welcome back to the top Backyard Grill. New top 3 are Backyard Grill, P.O.'s Burgers and Otto's Barbecue. Will it last?

We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Cedar Creek

After a week off, the craving struck again. Needed a burger. What kind of burger? A big, fat nasty (read: juicy and delicious) bar-style burger. We started a short list of bars that we wanted to go hit that we knew served burgers and quickly dwindled it down to Cedar Creek, mostly because it's my absolute favorite beer spot in Houston.

Cedar Creek is a bar among bars. It's tucked back from the main roads, surrounded by lots of big trees and has a huge patio that literally pulls up right to a creek. They have a really nice draft wall including several Texan beers, including 4 kinds of Shiner, 4 kinds of Saint Arnold, Lone Star, and heck, you can even get a can of Pearl if you want it. The weather has been absolutely amazing so the need to sit on that patio and chew some cow while sipping on Shiner Hefeweizen was on the front of my mind.

Our group rolled into Cedar Creek right at dusk on a Wednesday night. We quickly learned that half of the city also had the need to drink beers on the best bar patio in town and spent a few minutes fighting for a table. We got ourselves to a picnic table and grabbed some menus. Lots of burger options. We dropped our order in for a Blue Hog burger that is topped with blue cheese and bacon, a Mushroom Swiss burger and a Dutchess that comes with chili and extra onions.

This is where things go wrong. Cedar Creek was absolutely slammed. We waited over an hour for food simply because it was obvious that they were overrun with demand. Still, the food that was coming out of the kitchen looked absolutely amazing.

Then the burgers arrived and things changed. The burgers arrived and looked delicious. However, one bite in and all that we could taste was bread. Two bites in and we tasted bread and a little bit of smoke. Three bites in and we didn't find any other flavor. It was completely dry, if not burnt. The condiments were spread very thin and didn't really add any flavor. A high point? The vegetables were very fresh. Topping the burger with full spears of pickle was especially nice. Unfortunately, the freshness of the vegetables stops impressing once you realize that there is more lettuce on your burger than there is meat.

Did you watch The Matrix? Remember the scene where they are eating protein goop in the ship's dining room? That's what I would imagine the burger tasted like, except burnt. Cedar Creek has officially beaten me in creating a burger inspired by an elephant graveyard in the middle of a desert. Terrible. Absolutely terrible. I don't know if that's the standard burger at Cedar Creek or if the chef was asleep at the wheel, but the ownership should seriously reprimand, if not flat out fire whoever is ultimately responsible for what we were served depending on if what we received was the usual fare. It was a nine dollar burger that made me want nothing more than to go down the street to Burger King and get a Whopper. Sad, but true. I'd rather have a Whopper.

Cedar Creek does have some very tasty food options. We also had an order of their sloppy nachos at the table and an order of fried pickles. They were fantastic. We all agreed that the fried pickles were some of the best that we have ever had and that the nachos were showstopping. I'm already craving a gigantic tray of them not even 24 hours later.

So, what was learned? Cedar Creek is still a fantastic bar. I love it. Everyone that came along liked the atmosphere, the beer selection is great and there are lots of decent food options. We'll all go back. Often. What will we not do? Order a burger. If I needed a burger I'd work the Han Solo angle and smuggle in a #1 combination from Whataburger to go with my beer. Not surprisingly, Cedar Creek is rocking last place on the quest for the best burger in the city. Not even close to any other place that we have been.

The quest goes on...

NOTE: Yes, this post is picture free. While the burgers looked great, they tasted awful, and pictures wouldn't do them any justice. Executive decision. I never claimed I'd be fair. I am interested if anyone else has ever had their burger and would like to chime in with their thoughts about it. Did we get a fluke? Does it always suck? What's the deal?

Mytiburger

Tuesday night burger? You betcha! Today's stop was decided by a recommendation we received at the Houston Burgers twitter account. We were sent to Mytiburger which is at 2211 W 43rd St, see it on the burger map.

You arrive in a parking lot which has nothing but a teeny tiny little burger stand. It's old. You can tell it moved in at least 20 or 25 years ago. It may look like a dive, but it is very clean and well maintained.

Inside the itty-bitty restaurant they have about 3 tables and a booth to complement the 4 picnic tables they have outside. The entire place is decorated in Coca-Cola. The tables, walls, fixtures, even some of the chairs were all branded with the soda, making it pretty obvious I wasn't going to be getting my hands on a Diet Pepsi on this trip. The place is a three person mom and pop operation during peak dinner hour. They had a cook, someone taking the orders and an extra hand running around trying to look busy.

What do we order? The group gets 4 Mytiburgers with cheese. Three of us opted for standard fries but Mytiburger also serves up sweet potato fries and one of us grabbed an order of those. Then Coca-Cola and Diet Coke all around. We had to go easy on the sodas though, Mytiburger charges 50 cents for a refill and they sure do put a lot of ice in your cup. We grabbed a table outside to enjoy the arrival of some cooler weather and began the wait.

Ten minutes of waiting were rewarded with two little white lunch sacks packed with burgers and fries. We divied it out and quickly began chowing down. What were we rewarded with? One of the absolute best old-fashioned burgers we've ever had. I need to stress the word old-fashioned. This isn't the best burger that we've had on this trip, but much like Otto's Barbecue, these burgers have that classic flavor that you can only really seem to get from older, more traditional burger stands. You could draw a good comparison with Whataburger. The Mytiburger tastes exactly like the absolute best Whataburger that you could ever put in your mouth, the Nick creature even declared that the burger was probably exactly what the W tasted like back when it was a little burger stand in Corpus Christi. Every single item I could touch on compares almost exactly to Whataburger. The bun, the veggies, the patty, everything is just like Whataburger only a little bit better. Even the grease level was about the same. Bonus points? They don't put mayo on their burgers. Mustard only. Other burger joints should take some notes.

The french fries were standard, fat, plain fries. I had to douse mine in salt, pepper and ketchup to give them any flavor. More bonus points? Old school red ketchup squeezebottles. Even more bonus points? It was nearly empty so I could make a few immature fart jokes. Unlike the regular fries, the sweet potato fries were, to sum it up in a word, badass. Crispy, thin and a refreshing change to the usual fries and onion rings. I recommend that anyone who hits up Mytiburger try them at least once.

The verdict? As we've already noted, this burger is fantastic, but it didn't hit home enough to make us declare it the best burger in Houston. It lands smack dab in the middle of all of the competition so far, although for a more classic tasting burger, you cant go wrong with Mytiburger. Wait, last minute bonus points? Yes. Ladies, if you ever need a burger with a view, Mytiburger is conveniently right next door to a fire station. The girls didn't seem to have much to contribute to the conversation during the meal... almost as if they were distracted by something. Just sayin'.....

See you next week!!

(UPDATE 9/3/2009: We stand corrected. Sources say this building came outta the 50's.)

Goodson's Cafe

We were fast approaching deadline this week and had to get to a burger joint fast. So we jump on 249, a freeway that has yet to get any love on the site, and we went out in search of the American classic. We ended up stopping at Goodson's Cafe, which is a restaurant I have been to several times in my day because they are known for having one of the best chicken fried steaks money can buy. We decide to go inside and test the burger.

When we get in, you instantly realize that you are in a southern restuarant. The place is lined with anything and everything cowboy related that you can imagine. We are seated in a booth and handed menus that boast about two things. They claim to serve the world's best chicken fried steak and then they also plug the world's best double bacon cheeseburger. Nick orders one and I opt for the mushroom/grilled onion burger while our lady friends order up their world famous chicken fried steaks.

The burgers made their way to the table and as soon as they were put in front of us we knew we were in for something special. The grease was already bleeding out all over the plate. What was inside the bleeding corpse? The "world famous" burger was 2 patties totaling one pound of ground beef, a griddle toasted bun, lettuce, pickle, and sauteed onions with mayonnaise. The mushroom burger I ordered was the same thing except minus one of the half pound patties and with mushrooms, of course. I also opted for mustard because mayonnaise is terrible. It was time to dig in!

Upon first bite we knew we had stumbled upon something special. We hadn't even really planned on going to this restaurant any time in the near future, but almost as if by providence we both wound up with a mouthful of one of the most heavenly cheeseburgers we had ever tasted. Before even swallowing that first bite we were talking, with our mouths full, about how this burger had just bested every other burger that we've tasted thus far. The grease was everywhere. Napkins couldn't fly fast enough. The grilled onions were caramelized and seasoned to give off a little bit of a sweet flavor while the patty contrasted with a somewhat peppery, very intense, and very juicy beef flavor that just about blew the brains out of the backs of our skulls. All this time, the buckets of grease combined the flavors throughout the toppings, spread and bun resulting in a taste that will roll your eyes into the back of your head. Best burger we have had so far.

We almost need to award a prize over the fact that Goodson's Cafe is the first burger joint out of all of the places we have been to that actually cooked a burger medium when ordered. Everywhere else we have been has just cranked out medium-well as if born to do it, no matter what you ordered. Some of these places you could tell them to just run some raw meat on a plate through a warm room and you'd still get medium well. Not Goodson's. You get what you want.

How were the side dishes? The french fries, while looking very plain in the photo, were fried to a nice crispy finish. They weren't as gamechanging as their burger was, but they were delicious, which is refreshing because minus the Backyard Grill, we've found that the better the burger the worse the fries.

So, what are you waiting for? If you are craving a cheeseburger, you need to head out 249 towards Tomball and sink your teeth into one of Houston's finest. Check the burger map for the location and enjoy.

P.O.'s Burgers

P.O.s Burgers is the next stop on the quest for the ultimate cheeseburger. It's a middle-of-nowhere burger stop that's in Cypress, TX which is a little almost-suburb of Houston. The restaurant itself is an offshoot of a country bar and dance hall that's attached to the back of the building. The sign promises the world's best burgers. So we went in to see if they can stand up to their claims.
When you walk in, you walk into what was obviously a bar at some point. A bar stretches around the L-shaped dining area and behind it there is a griddle and some fryers where the food is prepared. There were a lot of old, dusty beer signs and memorabilia on the walls of the dining area. which was made up of wooden picnic tables. In fact, when you really take a look around, you realize that the entire place is either dead trees or scrap metal

Taking a look at the menu, they offer the usual selection of hamburgers, cheeseburgers and bacon cheeseburgers, but they also have buffalo, ostrich and turkey burgers. Their specialty is the P.O. burger which is a mushroom, bacon and swiss burger with mayo and lettuce only. All of them are offered up in 1/4 lb and 1/2 lb sizes. You can also get specialty buns that weren't unloaded off of a truck that are made out of fresh baked white, wheat or jalepeno cheese breads.

Deciding that the place needed to be judged based on their namesake burger, I ordered the P.O. burger with fries on the jalepeno cheese bun. They asked me what kind of fries I wanted, and I had to ask what they had. This was a mistake because the list weighs in at about six hundred different varieties. They have french fries, waffle fries, cheese fries, cajun fries, curly fries, steak fries, onion fries (which are really just onion rings) and tater tots. If you have a specific way you like your deep fried potatoes, P.O.'s has it.

While waiting for the food to come out we noticed two things that made us really anticipate the perfect, hole in the wall, middle of nowhere, mom and pop cheeseburger. The ketchup bottle and the roof. The ketchup was the most generic bottle of tomato paste we'd ever seen and then the roof? Completely made of tin. It definitely brought that small town feeling to a place not very far from the big city.

Before the burgers made their way out I also noted that I might have found the worst soda fountain in the city. I'm used to a soda fountain dumping too much carbonated water in the drink, but too much syrup? This was new, and it wasn't much of a treat. The Diet Coke was overpowering and then when I tried the Coca-Cola Classic I was greeted with the same super sweet flavor I was trying to escape. I stuck with it though, as I didn't want to venture a guess as to how old the iced tea was.

Our number was called and the burgers were on their way out. They come in good-ol' red baskets, wrapped in butcher paper that the grease has eaten almost completely through. It's definitely the juiciest burger we've seen short of the Gut Bomb from Otto's Barbecue. First bite? FANTASTIC!! The place may not have great amenities, they might have terrible soda, they might have ketchup manufactured in China that contains lead and asbestos, but the burger was something else.

The first taste I got was sweet. The jalepeno cheese bread had a little bit of sugar in it to make it a sweet kind of bread and it melted in my mouth with the assistance of the grease from the patty. That taste gave way to the flavor of bacon, mushrooms, cheese and mayonnaise, which is a condiment I usually despise, but in this case the combination of bread, grease and vegetables came together and produced one of the richest flavors I have ever gotten out of a burger. Then the patty. It hits just when you don't think your tastebuds can take much more, suddenly blending fresh cow in with all the flavors that you've already experienced.

We all quickly agree that this is one of the best burgers we've had so far despite the rest of the places shortcomings. I was convinced it was one of the best we've had and struggled to rank it while Nick quickly declared it the new silver medalist in our search. I couldn't disagree. Once again we are still convinced that Backyard Grill has them beat, but P.O.'s put the stomp on all the other competition we have found so far, including the legendary Lankford Grocery and our old second favorite, Otto's BBQ.

Check the map and give P.O.'s a try for yourself. It's a fantastic burger that will probably become one of your staples, especially if you live out on the northwest side.

Lankford Grocery

This week's review covers what has been by far and away the most recommended burger in the city. Since we started the website we have had a ton of recommendations for places to go. Usually someone just recommends one of their favorite places and a few places they've heard of, and that's how we have assembled the list of places we plan on going. Lankford had about ten different people telling us we needed to go there when the next most recommendations came sliding in at a not nearly as impressive two. Expectations were incredibly high.


We showed up and found the place to be the absolute definition of a dive. Just walking up you get a patio shaded by very old trees, which seem to have moved the foundation around because the entire restaurant seems to have a tilt to it. Then you make it inside and notice and some of the roof beams are seperating. Red, white and blue tablecloths and nothing inside seemed newer than 1985 except for a picture of Guy Fieri's big fat bleached blonde head. Apparently he likes the burgers. The decor was described perfectly as "America".

What do we order? Chicken strips? HA! 3 bigass cheeseburgers are en route to our table. Before they come out though, in a little disappointing fashion, the sodas come out. In cans. No free refills. It's 2009 and this is America, my fat ass requires no less than three full 32 oz glasses of Diet Coke fresh out of a soda fountain. To compensate, I upgraded my beverage to a Shiner Smokehaus. Delicious!

The burgers come out wrapped up in 3 pieces of parchment paper in a classic all american plastic burger basket. They are huge. Definitely a double fister. I take the easy way out and cut the beast in half. I didn't order any fries, but at the table there is an order of fries and an order of onion rings within reach. Time to bite into what I am convinced is going to be the best burger I've ever devoured.

The burger is great. The bun was lightly toasted, and strangely only half covered in sesame seeds on every single burger that came out. I had to go looking for the slice of cheese, but only because the burger was so big that a slice of cheese doesn't cover all of the real estate. The vegetables were thick and generously applied.

The patty is obviously formed by hand and it crumbles apart in your mouth without really even needing to bite into it. As soon as your teeth are in the bread, you have tiny little pieces of meat rolling off onto your tongue, almost as if they want to chew themselves. This behavior is something I approve of wholeheartedly. The burger does have a little bit of drip action, but the juice doesn't really run like what I would expect out of something I would label a greaseburger, which isn't a criticism at all, just take it and apply that fact to your personal taste. They don't seem to be very drippy because they are obviously cooked over an open flame, at least, that's what the scorch marks lead me to believe since I didn't really taste any smokey flavor, except in my beer.

Was anything truly bad at Lankford? Yep. Hands down, Lankford Grocery serves up the worst french fries I've ever tasted. Imagine getting a bag of frozen french fries from Wendy's, undercooking them and then putting absolutely no seasoning on them whatsoever. Gross? Yes. Plain, soggy fries are unacceptable, but nevertheless, that's Lankford's super secret french fry recipe. On the other hand, the onion rings were great. Whenever I find myself back here, that's definitely the side I am going with.

The question though, is this burger the best burger I've ever had? No. It's very, very good but as for where we stand on our burger reviews I would rather go to Backyard Grill, and as an added bonus, they are open at dinner time whereas Lankford shuts down right at 3pm and takes the weekend off.

See you next week folks!!